Archives For lifestyle


February 26, 2018 — Leave a comment

It’s been about 54 days since my last cup of coffee. There are days when I feel out of it and want to give up, especially mid-afternoon. That’s when the aid of baby wipes or a splash of cold water around the eyes help get the sting out. Sometimes the use of eye drops are required to clear the fogginess that comes along with staying awake for so long.

Following a caffeine-free lifestyle has proven that it’s possible to wake up and rely on the internal energies that you naturally possess to jump start the day. Sure, the winter mornings can get the best of you and get you rolling out of bed at a snail’s pace. Then there’s the whole issue of having a big breakfast when your body doesn’t really want to eat at all. Besides that, mornings are generally OK.

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To put it simply: it’s time to cut coffee out of my diet.

Don’t get me wrong or anything… I’ve been an average user of the stuff. At height of it all, I would consume up to four cups a day. There would be times I would substitute energy drinks to get the required fix (which also included its own set of problems).

Here is my personal take, in regards to the pros and the cons…

  • thinking on the fly becomes a daring act — I believe I think faster. I know I talk faster. I can get ideas and I can suddenly spew out a thousand words a second.
  • thinking faster results in less of self-criticism, especially in high tension situation that can result in a mild anxiety episode
  • caffeine naps; something I haven’t truly mastered but felt the benefits when done right… go away for a few minutes and come back rocking and rolling.

As for the cons…

  • the after effects of caffeine is fueling my existing traces of anxiety and leaving me in an antsy state of mind — which results in losing focus.
  • it can be an expensive habit if you’re drinking outside your home
  • dependency — let’s face it, it’s a drug and when I don’t get my fix I get the tension headaches and I get into a negative, grouchy mood… because of that…
  • influencing/affecting my behavior: if I drink it, I’m happy… if I don’t… then I get into a foul mood and leads to me acting negatively to those around me.


So, yeah. It’s time to quit coffee to avoid the caffeine. I know there’s decaf and there are things like “Kaffree” for people who want to retain the taste of the good stuff without feeling those ill effects of caffeine. For me, I know in the end, it won’t be perfect. I’ll probably get a milk tea fix now and then… but it’s specifically that smell and texture and the kick you get in the face that coffee gives me that I need to stop.

I can’t take a chance. And so this is my plan and my grand farewell to the good stuff that I had loved for so many years.

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December 18, 2017 — Leave a comment

Supposedly, it takes an average of 66 days to make or break a habit. Nope, it’s not 21 days apparently as we once thought before so… more days, more fun! Don’t worry, it’s just numbers being thrown around, so it shouldn’t really matter at all because we should focus on that aspect too long. It’s good for a visual so you can see what the heck is going on (like having a physical calendar to cross each day off whenever your successful so you can have that gratification in completing something).

The days can be daunting but if you don’t get one down, you’ll never get to day two or day 66 or even… day 500. It’s all about routine and so… maybe it’s just wise for you to stop now and just open up that word document you have been putting off and just write out 500 words… no wait, make it just even 250 words. Yeah, that’s better… just do it.

It’s taking a long hard fight to realize that excuses are the enemy. That and blaming. While all that energy is being put into that pile of useless thought, we could be finishing that screenplay, doing push-ups, or finishing that book you left two months ago.

B-b-but, I’m just suffering from a block! I can’t get into the FLOW! It’s just a struggle! So, it’s okay for me to complain about the pain so I can deal with it… Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight?
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“Meditation is not to get out of society, to escape from society, but to prepare for a reentry into society.” — Thich Nhat Hanh, from Being Peace.

The more mindful you become of your daily activities, no matter how mundane they are, you can start to feel more alive. The best way I can describe it is to compare it as a synchronization between the mind and the body. The control factor is always you the practitioner. And what you control is your breathing. There are probably hundreds of techniques you could employ and you wouldn’t be wrong in any way as long as you can benefit from it.

For myself, it’s as simple as reminding you that you are alive. Or a breaking down of techniques found in zen practices in the wonderful books of Thich Nhat Hanh.

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I never went to film school. Probably will never attend a school. I did take workshops at film initiatives and even graduated from a dedicated Scriptwriting Program and watched thousands of movies at home… and even took a free online course about the history and the use of color and sound in movies.

Is it worth it? All the trouble and following the alternative path?

I have already accepted my fate as a non-filmmaker but a more writer-ly goal. That I can control and that I can continue to dance freely as possible at home and trying to construct the right amount of words to make people feel good, scared, sad, and pissed off. I need that fix and there’s nothing more uplifting than the high of a writer from writing a few thousand words. It’s always the beginning flow that takes so goddamn long and then after a good hard run of words, you just can’t stop.

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Quiet before the storm. 

Darkest before the dawn.

Life’s a piece a shit when you look at it.

Finding and dropping the right quote at the right time is like taking a precision shot at an apple on top of some poor chap’s head. And the quotes I’m thinking about are all related to what will be the toughest four weeks ahead. The theme is related to change and we humans are never ready for a change. In fact, I’m sure most of us will whine at the idea of changing a trusted routine. Some may even curl up and hide in some closet, hoping for the world to pass or focusing their energies on trying to teleport their way out of the problem.

It’s the greatest moment of fight or flight ever. And this time, I cannot afford to fly away just yet. There’s going to be the greatest test yet and it’s going to be an incredible battle. Continue Reading…


The life of the writer is filled with long hours of sitting down. Back in 2013, during my “Lost Weekend” phase, I was spending a lot of time trying to write. I did experiment with a standing desk thing and, at first, it worked. I got addicted and that addiction fucks with your knees pretty bad. Moderation was the major key here if you are ever curious how that whole thing worked.

Fast forward to present day and I’m still not really hitting the gym as I wished. But I have been working two teaching jobs and spending a bulk of my time outside and on my feet. During my time in Vietnam, I spent a majority of my time standing and it affected my knees a lot. So I opted to keep moving around and only resorted to sitting when required.

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