Stumbling upon an advertisement for a 20LB blanket for therapeutic reasons, I became intrigued. It’s supposed to mimic the feeling of someone holding you as you sleep, as the weight is just heavy enough to give the comfort of mother swaddling a baby. And for someone who is dying from the lack of an intimate physical contact from their partner, it seems like a possible remedy.At first, it feels shameful. Almost like those individuals who turn to the expensive silicone sex dolls that can cost thousands of dollars. For those folks, it may seem like some perverted fantasy of never being able to be “socially healthy” enough to achieve the necessary steps to gain a real human being as their partner. Or it could a lack of a physical touch that leads to the true nature of how, we humans, require the social interaction that makes us sane.
At first, it feels shameful. Almost like those individuals who turn to the expensive silicone sex dolls that can cost thousands of dollars. For those folks, it may seem like some perverted fantasy of never being able to be “socially healthy” enough to achieve the necessary steps to gain a real human being as their partner. Or it could a lack of a physical touch that leads to the true nature of how, we humans, require the social interaction that makes us sane.
Just the other day, while chatting with Bunny, she asked me directly, “Do you ever feel lonely? You work all the time and barely have any time for friends.” Which is true. I have been consumed by work and the most social interaction derives from the interactions with my students and my fellow colleagues. But outside of that, I barely have time to grab a coffee with my fellow pals who are slinging it at the cinematic world. They are moving forward with the dream while I sidetracked to the world of living within the system.
I told Bunny, as long as we kept our communication healthy enough across the 14,000 KM distance, I felt emotionally healthy enough to pull through all the major challenges I face every day.
It isn’t perfect, of course. So a cheaper solution to help with the anxiety, stress, and depression, is seen as a golden ticket to resolve any difficulties with managing the long-distance relationship.
There was an article I once read that talked about the proper amount of physical contact you should strive for every day. And based on hugs, the ultimate goal is about twelve hugs a day.
If you could get that, then your body would release the right amount of chemicals to make you feel all bubbly inside and allow you to keep your sanity.
However, as you already questioned, obtaining twelve hugs a day can be a daunting task and, for some, almost impossible. When you are living alone by circumstance or choice… you don’t have many options. I mean, you could try to hug yourself as an alternative but I don’t think it’s the same to have that heavy and warm embrace.
This is where that 20LB blanket comes it, which is supposed to give you that feeling as you slumber at night.
Don’t get me wrong about solitude. I’ve always been an advocate for spending ample time alone and to truly understand yourself. It’s scary to bear witness to all the dark thoughts and concerns that your mind could throw at you. Which, is very important to practice, because you have to constantly be aware of your mortality so that you can prioritize what you need to do.
Not only this fear of being alone, we have this lack of contact with the natural world. As kids, I didn’t care too much. Sure, I rode around on my bicycle like crazy when I was in grade 6 and spent a ton of time outside, but as we got older and as technology got better and the entertainment got more advanced — we all got disconnected with nature.
The modern teenager is probably going to be using their phone as if it’s an extension of their body and the only time they can truly disconnect from it, it will be during the time of an upgrade. We’ve become like those little crabs you seen on the beach that outgrows our shell and goes hunting for the next bigger and better shell.
We’re lugging this crazy thing and we think it will shield us from the danger of the world. But this is the delusional part — it doesn’t protect us from the world but blinds us from the truth. We need it to survive because we have our contacts to maintain, meetings to go to, job interviews we are patiently waiting for — but it’s the fact that we believe they are the greatest thing we have at our disposal is where we are going to be shit as a species.
Technology has kind of stopped and it’s sort of shitty. We are bound to this little supercomputer and it’s not improving our lives as we would think but making as more depended on crazy ass stuff.
Just look at how they advertise the latest and greatest iPhone and the possibilities of turning yourself into a talking piece of poo.
We are tech zombies, slaved to looking at our crotches and hands and forgetting out beautiful the sky could be and how the sound and smells of nature could just bring your heartbeat down a little to realize how wonderful it is to feel alive.
It’s not important to be notified about your baby.
Honestly, we don’t care too much for your baby. You should care about your baby and how it grows and how it eats and learn. You should be so absorbed about him or her, but you should forget about your baby and keep watch from a tiny screen. And to be honest, your baby can be… Unattractive.
So basically, we need more hugs.
It’s hard to get them when people are busy hugging their phones — all wrapped up being within the virtual reality world we are slowly building and making better with each advancement. For me, the problem is even worse when you have some form of social anxiety disorder and with this… it’s even more stressful and harder to deal with modern society. I’m glad they made a $100 blanket with the purpose of making it feel like a hug so you could sleep better at night. At the same time, it does seem sad because we have resorted to this solution as the best solution that isn’t prescribed by your doctor.
For me, it’s OK if you need to get it. Better to try and nurture yourself than to numb the pain when it’s already too late to do anything about it.
So, if you cannot get the twelve hugs a day, then you can have one major hug all night long — all 7 to 8 hours of it. Don’t be ashamed if you need it and if you cannot afford one, do what I am doing… stack yourself under a crap ton of blankets to recreate it. Sure it’s hot as hell but it’s definitely worth it. I also suggest sleeping in the nude, because it’ll make it more bearable and allows your genitals to air out the sweat.