It only takes a few seconds to realize that you’re coming home. For me, it was boarding the flight and hearing something familiar. In this case, it was Carly Rae Jepsen. Perhaps it wasn’t the best reminder of home, but she’s Canadian and I am too. Close enough.
Here’s a quote:
Travel is glamorous only in retrospect. — Paul Theroux
It’s always like that. Our memories is all we have and if we lose that, then you’re shit. Therefore, the disease that eats the memories away is the worst. While I watch my aunt slowly died by cancer, she was consciousness enough to send her farewells and to come to realize that she had a wonderful life with family and friends who loved her.
My grandmother on the other hand… she had a long slow spiral in the form of dementia that ate away the memories. The last time I saw her alive, she wasn’t able to speak my name but it only took a smile and that kind look in her eyes to know who I was. It was a silent moment, but that was all I needed.
So memories. Travelling. You want to hear the good stuff. I understand.
Cuba. It’s a nice place. Though, Vietnam is more humid place with more vicious mosquitoes. This particular trip wasn’t across the country, compared to the trip to Vietnam that had an aside into Cambodia. It was more the classic situation of relaxing at a resort and enjoying the ocean for what it was: extremely salty. I’ll let you imagine the cause and effect of that.
The basics to get out of the way: rum is tasty, beer is great, food is beyond expectations (don’t aim too high now), the sun is deceiving, song and dance is in the hearts of the Cuban people, and the coffee is simply amazing.
The bad? Public washrooms. If you need to pee pee, you’re okay if you’re a guy. Girls, be wary of seatless toilets. If it’s doing the doo doo… bring some TP but don’t expect things to be completely… flushed. You come to realize that resort is the gold standard after experiencing the wildness of the true Cuban world. And free too, since there are some “guards” hanging around the toilets demanding a few pesos for their work.
I also took the time to work on journaling the old fashion way and working on my cursive writing. There’s something about letting the words flow while on the shore of the Atlantic ocean.
Ideas. I think I had this fantasy of coming up with many possible stories while letting my mind relax. But I came to terms that if you try and force it, nothing will appear. You got to let the free writing be completely free, no matter how absurd the possibilities are.
On another post, I said there was a choice between overseas teaching or making a movie. Then I thought of my grandfather who was a jack of all trades and decided to finally apply for accreditation. I shall strengthen my teaching portfolio and begin snooping around for some possibilities. In the meantime, I need to dust off my work boots while that happens. One realistic step at a time.
While that happens, I need to get a hold of the local community to get something done. I think all this waiting for a push is pathetically stupid because no one is going to help. I decided to throw myself off this cliff of uncertainty and get as much done as possible and hang on to what provides me the greatest joy. Even my TESL teachers told me to go for the dream since I am young, especially a sub teacher I met during my practicum. She is a musician herself and told me that I shouldn’t wait too long and to continue to practice my art.
Though, this doesn’t mean I shall slump back into the confusion that was before. An important lesson I learned from Cuba: as long as you have a home and a job, you got the essentials pat down. Let’s deal with the bare essentials before the delusions of grandeur kick in.
I hope your summer so far is swell. I’m re-energized and ready to rock and roll.
P.S. – here is a delicious playlist that I quickly compiled together yesterday for my day of lounging around… since it was my birthday after all: